The more that we choose not to talk about domestic violence, the more we shy away from the issue, the more we lose. ~Russell Wilson
No, this is not the month of October, no domestic violence awareness month. But domestic abuse, or intimate partner violence, is just not limited to any particular class or to any particular month. It occurs in millions of households every day, and a huge number of these incidents go unreported.
UP sees 1,000 cases of domestic violence every day. In a span of just four months, 1.24 lakh cases of domestic violence have been reported from Uttar Pradesh, at a staggering 957 every day.
Recently, the family court in Bandra granted a divorce to actress Karisma Kapoor and entrepreneur Sunjay Kapur, marking the end of their 13-year marriage. While the couple was fighting a divorce case and for the custody of their two kids, Samaira and Kiaan, the actress filed a complaint of mental harassment against her husband and mother-in-law.
So domestic violence can happen to anyone — young, old, rich, poor, educated, or not so educated. Sometimes violence begins early in a relationship, and other times it takes months or even years to appear.
Meena Kandasamy, in her book, When I Hit You, Or, a Portrait of the Writer as a Young Wife, describes domestic violence thus: I begin to learn that there are no screams that are loud enough to make a husband stop. There are no screams that cannot be silenced by the shock of a tight slap.
Yes, this is how the violence at home affects everyone within the household, whether or not family members are victims of abuse themselves, and it extends well beyond the confines of the home, affecting neighbours, family, friends, co-workers, and the community at large.
If you know someone living in a domestic violence situation, if you suspect that domestic violence is happening, here are a few steps you can take to help stop domestic violence in your neighbourhood.
Know the signs: There generally are some warning signs. Be wary of some of the red flags an abuser may exhibit at any point in a relationship: an abuser may be jealous, may discourage his or her partner to spend time away from him, may embarrass or shame the partner, may control all financial decisions, may make the partner guilty for all the problems in the relationship, may prevent the partner from working, may intimidate the partner physically, especially with weapons.
Don’t ignore it: Police officers hear the same thing from witnesses again and again—I heard/saw/perceived domestic violence but didn’t want to get involved. If you hear your neighbours engaged in a violent situation, call the police. It could save a life.
Lend an ear: If someone ever confides in you they are experiencing domestic violence, listen without judgement. Believe what they are telling you and ask how you can be of any help.
Be available: If someone you know is in fear that the violence will escalate, be ready to help. Keep your phone with you and the ringer on so that you can help the affected. Know the number to a nearby shelter. You never know who might need refuge in a hurry.
Check in regularly: If a loved one or friend is in danger, reach out regularly to ensure her safety.
Be a resource: Someone experiencing violence may not be able to research shelters, escape plans or set up necessities like bank accounts and cell phones while living with her abuser. Offer to help ease stress and keep things confidential.
Write it down: Document every incident you witness and include the date, time, location, injuries and circumstances. This information could be very useful in later police reports and court cases, both criminal and civil.
Raise awareness: Assist a local shelter or domestic violence organization in their efforts to raise awareness in your community. Or use your personal connections to start a grassroots campaign. Organize talks at your workplace, wellness centres, and in different social groups.
And last but not the least, just let a victim of domestic violence know that they are worthy, they deserve better and can heal. Being a victim is nothing to be ashamed of — this assurance, perhaps will make her feel a bit better. And really, everyone deserves to feel safe and no one deserves to be mistreated.
Source > http://blogs.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-n-style/walk-against-domestic-violence/